Background Information
2.1 Chinese Weddings
In China, marriage has always been valued and it is governed by various traditions and in most cases it is decided by the parents of the bride and the bridegroom. Traditionally, wealth and social status were important considerations as a person was only allowed to marry someone of equal status. In the feudal society, marriage ceremony was preceded by some procedures like the proposing. The proposal was usually done by the mans parents together with a match maker who was usually a woman. During the first visit to the girls parents, the match maker and the boys parents were not served with tea to avoid lightening the marriage. In case the proposal turned out to be successful, the match maker was rewarded accordingly. Matchmaking was meant to determine whether the marriage would be successful or not, and it was done using the girls name and birthday. Betrothal gifts were then taken to the girls parents if the match was predicted to be auspicious. The grandest etiquette of the whole process of engagement involved presenting the marriage gifts to the girls family which was a symbol of kindness and respect to the family of the girl and capability of provision of good life to the girl once she got married. The date of the wedding as latter chosen by an astrologer having been requested to do so by the boys parents.
Just before the wedding ceremony, the dowry of the bride, which represented her wealth, was sent to the boys house. The most common dowries which were sent included vases which symbolized peace and rulers which indicated acres of land. During the wedding day, the bride was met at her home by the groom and his party. Before their arrival, the groom was helped to prepare by a respectable woman. The bridegroom usually wore a red skirt as the color signified delight and her hair were tied with colorful cotton threads. On the arrival of the grooms party, the bride and her mother would cry to signify the reluctance of leaving her home. The bride was then led a long a red carpet in a festive atmosphere by her elder brother to the sedan. The bridegroom only managed to see his wife after passing through a series of difficulties which were placed along his path intentionally. As a sign of worship to the heaven, parents and the spouse, the bridegroom bowed three times with his head touching the ground (Yee Lee 2005 para 1).
After the marriage ceremony, the couple was led to the bridal chamber while the guests were left to go on with the feasting. In some regions the relatives and friends would chat with the newly weds during the wedding night with an aim of helping them to be conversant with each other. In the process, various foods and drinks were served. For instance, wine was frequently used which was supposed to be poured to the brim of the cup but it was not supposed to spill over. After about three days the newly weds visited the brides parents and were received by relatives and the parents of the bride. However, although the above represents most of the Chinese wedding customs, they vary from one region to another. In addition, due to the influence of the western world, most of the wedding customs have changed as people always prefer to simplify the wedding ceremonies (Yee Lee, 2005 para 4).
2.2 Weddings in Hong Kong
Wedding rituals in Hong Kong have many rituals of Chinese origins since Hong Kong is part of China. Although traditionally the boys parents together with a mediator carried out the responsibility of choosing a suitable mate for their son, nowadays due to the Western influence, it is usually the duty of the two young people to decide on marriage. After courtship that is usually done using the Western style, the boy, his parents, or a mediator well known by the two families, approach the parents of the girl to discuss on marriage requirements. Once the two families agree, the date of the wedding is finally set. However, since the Chinese people consider good luck to be very important expect for Christians, a fortune teller is consulted to ensure that the wedding date coincides with a lucky day in a Chinese calendar. After setting the wedding date, the two families bargain on the suitable bride price which can be paid directly to the parents of the girl (Renee 2006 para 2 3).
Wedding invitation is usually done by the family of the bride. They usually send invitation letters to family members and relatives in red envelopes. In addition, the cake, which is usually delivered to the brides family on a lucky day before the wedding, is usually distributed to the relatives and friend, as wedding invitation gift. The parents of the girl have also to decide on what to offer as a wedding gift which may include furniture, a house or apartment, depending with their financial ability. However, they are not supposed to buy a bed, it is supposed to be provided by the groom.
During the wedding day, the groom usually goes to get his bride. However, he is prevented to do so until he pays the luck money, which is usually placed in the red packets and presented to the person who opens the door. After receiving the bride, the wedding party heads to the registrys office for the wedding ceremony or in one of the few authorized churches. However, the couples are required to register in advance, failure to which may not have their wedding officiated (Renee 2006 Para 34). The actual wedding ceremony is a simple affair, usually attended by the family members, relatives and close friends. However, the wedding banquet is usually a measure of some ones status such that the larger the banquet, the higher the status of the bride, groom and their families. The cost of the banquet is usually met by the grooms family since it is a celebration to welcome their daughter in law, the mother of their future grand children.
The dinner which is usually a noisy affair lasts for about two to three hours. The food served is usually ten course meal. The couple usually goes from table to table to toast their guests as they receive lively toasts as well. During the ceremony, the bride changes the white gown and wears the traditional red wedding outfit. Studies of Kagda Koh record that the most important part of the wedding celebration is the tea ceremony (2008 pp. 67 68). Initially, the bride was required to serve tea to all her in-laws older than her husband. The ceremony was supposed to signify acceptance such that if the in-laws refused the tea, it meant that they had not accepted the bride. However, due to various changes that have taken place, the tea ceremony is currently an occasion to bless the newly wed couple. During the ceremony, the bride receives money in red packets from her in-laws, which is usually known as luck money.
Although the financing of the wedding dinner is usually an obligation of the grooms family, the guests invited are also required to bring with them monitory gifts in red envelopes which are supposed to cover the costs of someones dinner. After the end of the dinner, the guests are seen off by the couple and their family members. However, by the end of it, the couple is usually very tired due to the technicalities involved in planning the wedding.
3.0 Discussions
3.1 Wedding Traditions and Rituals in Hong Kong
There is a famous Chinese proverb that clearly describes the place of women in the society which states that follow your father when you are young, your husband when you are married, and your son when you are old (The Hong Kong Polytechnic University, 2005 pp 54). The proverb basically means that women are supposed to be governed by mens decision through out their life. Traditionally, in Hong Kong, the woman did not have a right to choose her mate as it was the mans parents and the fortune teller, who used to choose a suitable mate for a man. Although the bride and the groom had a lot to do before the wedding day, the bride used to go through a lot. For instance, studies of Hong Kong Polytechnic University (2005 pp. 56) record that bride used to spend on the mat weeping for three nights and then during the wedding day, her voice was usually husky. The bride price was paid by the groom and his family. During the wedding day, bride was the one who was supposed to leave her family to go and live with her husbands family. However, nowadays most couples prefer to leave alone away from their parents. The woman only acquired the right to own property after marriage.
Weddings in Hong Kong and China meant more than just a union between a boy and a girl. Studies of The Hong Kong Polytechnic University (2005 pp. 58) indicate that it meant absorption of an alien member to the family of the groom or the man. It meant addition to the total labor force. Once married, the wife was expected to start bearing children immediately for the continuation of the family line. As much as the grooms family benefited from the marriage union, they still suffered some loss since the woman gained the right to ownership of the husbands property. Therefore, the grooms family was particularly careful while choosing the bride to ensure that they chose a loyal person who would take good care of her husbands property. However, it was the duty of brides parents to ensure that their daughters possess values that would enable them to make good wives and save them from future embarrassment.
There are a lot of traditions that characterize weddings in Hong Kong but most of the traditions are of Chinese origin as highlighted previously in this research. In addition, most of the traditions and customs have got meanings and significance. Although, most of them have been done away with due to the Westernization, there are few which have persisted. For instance, the match making, the initial marriage rite has greatly changed. Initially, match making was done by the boys parent assisted by a woman match maker. Although the act of match making had a spiritual basis, other things like material wealth was also put into consideration. The diviner was also paid by the parents of the groom to help them interpret some of the activities that were taking place during the match making process (The Hong Kong Polytechnic University 2005 pp 61). Wedding negotiations started immediately after a successful matchmaking activity.
The exchanging of marriage gifts was a common tradition between the brides and the grooms families. The grooms family sent gifts in form of money, clothing, wine, poultry and food to the brides family as a means of expressing respect and kindness. Giving of gifts was so common that even during the wedding day people were still expected to give various gifts. The groom was supposed to give some money to the family of the bride before he could be allowed to see the bride. The invited guests were also supposed to give some monitory gifts to the newly wed during the wedding banquet. In addition, the brides parents were also expected to give the newly wed furniture as gifts.
Bride seclusion was also common and it was basically treated as a way to allow the bride to prepare herself for the new environment. During the period of seclusion, which lasted for three days, the bride wept and sang lamentations known as the bridal lamentations. The end of the seclusion period was marked by the ritual cleansing of the bride, which was conducted at dawn of the wedding day. The bride bathed with hot water containing pummelo leaves to get rid of any evil fortune. Finally, her hair was combed to produce the hair line of a mature woman marking the end of the seclusion. The combing of the hair symbolized the adulthood of the couple.
The red color was an important feature in most of the Hong Kong and Chinese weddings. Most of the decorations were always in red and the gifts and invitation card were sent in red envelops. White was actually forbidden as it signified death thus why the wedding outfit was usually in red. The bride used to wear a red skirt. Color red was associated with luck and that is why it was the dominant wedding color (Michael 2008 para 2). Flowers were also used for decorations as they signified joy, happiness and fertility. Food taken was also significant like the full roast pig signified brides virginity.
3.2 Westernization and Globalization
Although the research has indicated that there are some traditional wedding customs which have persisted in Hong Kong, a lot of changes have occurred. Most of the weddings that take places currently are westernized as they portray most of the Western customs. The decision to get married is made by two young people after falling in love. Unlike initially when a mediator was used to approach the parents of the girl, nowadays even the groom can do it, although he can be assisted by her parents.
Planning of the wedding is also quite different. Initially it was the duty of the parents to plan their childrens wedding. Currently, there are wedding planers who are hired by the couple intending to get married to do all the planning. Wedding planers arrange everything ranging from decorations, transport, invitation cards, reception, to mention but a few. Most of the Christian marriages take place in churches and it is the duty of the father to walk her daughter down the aisle (Tall, 2002 para 3).
Studies of Wilson (2005 pp. 115) record that in the older days, wedding banquets used to take place in the village square or even in ones home. On the contrary, the same studies record that wedding banquets in the contemporary Hong Kong take place in major international hotels and restaurants. The decorations provided by the hotel or the restaurant are mostly of the Western origin. However, the use of the hotels and other commercial outlets for wedding banquets became more common after Hong Kong attained substantial economic development. At the wedding banquet, foreign liquor is served.
Traditionally, the bride and the groom used to wear traditional wedding outfits which were mostly red in color. Currently, the color of the wedding gown may vary depending with the bride. Photo taking which originated from Japan is also very common among most weddings in Hong Kong. The bridal party usually goes to particular place for a photo session and even after that the reception is characterized by taking of photos. After banquets, some couples prefer to go for one week or one month honey moon the same case with most couples in other parts of the world.
Although globalization has affected almost everything, weddings in Hong Kong have been greatly affected. Some wedding customs have been done away with while customs from other parts of the world have been incorporated. For instance, Renee (2006 para 2) affirms that courtship which precedes wedding is done in Western style. Although Chinese and people from Hong Kong may desire to keep some of the traditions, it is practically impossible due to the changes and development in technology which is taking place currently.
4.0 Conclusion
According to Tall, Hong Kong weddings have a lot contained in them especially due to the fact that they are a blend of Chinese and Western traditions (2002 para 3). Nevertheless, most studies illustrate weddings to be joyous occasions which require collective celebrations and have a lot of meaning attached to the occasion. Although some of the traditional wedding customs have been done away with, some are still practiced. For instance, the bride may have a wedding dress as she may like, but she must have one to represent China, usually known as quai boi. Though most weddings do take place in churches, banquet takes place elsewhere, in commercial outlets though that depends with the socio economic status of the couple. Although there have been changes, weddings in Hong Kong still hold their significant role of symbolizing union between a man and a woman to establish a new conjugal unit.
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